


make a move, you useless sapphics

by rudeandginger



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: BACK ON MY BULLSHIT, F/F, How Do I Tag, its just crack calm down, make a move you useless sapphics, ofc lena and sam trade memes when tipsy, texting gone awry, this is all utter nonsense, tumblr memes strike again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-26 10:09:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22483873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rudeandginger/pseuds/rudeandginger
Summary: Lena is texting both Sam and Kara while drinking too much of that stupid scotch Andrea brainwashed her into liking. Of course something will misfire. Kara and Lena will be useless while Sam pops an aneurysm, natch, but hey, look at that rating.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 10
Kudos: 335





	make a move, you useless sapphics

**Author's Note:**

> Lighthearted crack, I haven't a single clue when it's set and frankly I don't care. Enjoy the sexytimes while we all yeet the canon into an alternate multiverse.
> 
> Sam and Lena texting are one hundred percent myself and my best friend when we get on the game. This one's for you, pookins ;)
> 
> Blinding fuck, all that formatting was a bitch and a half.
> 
> Also, if the images are too small, I resized them so they stayed in screen on my phone in portrait mode. Long tap to open in a new window and they'll get bigger?
> 
> Edit 12/2020: the meme of Elliot Page is several years old (when they'd come out as gay) and when I wrote this fic they'd yet to come out as trans. So yes, Elliot is presenting femme in that photo and the meme is utterly wholesome so I am not sorry for using it. Cool? Cool.

Supergirl saved me again today. Yet another assassination attempt.  
Ooh, I bet you hired them in the first place so she'd save you. Strong arms, golden hair, sweet baby blues...  
Oh my god, shut the fuck up.  
Tell me you didn't enjoy it. Did she fly with you?  
Yes.  
Mm, sweet warmth. Bet she heard your heart rate fly off the charts.  
SAMANTHA ARIAS I SWEAR TO FUCK  
Fuck who? Not me, that's for sure.  
Ugh  
You are one gone little gay, Leelee.

You holding up okay? I heard the news.  
I'm okay. Supergirl was there for me.  
I'm so glad! ❤️️❤️️❤️️❤️️

Lena rolled her eyes as she took another gulp of her scotch. "You're not fooling anyone, Kara Danvers," she admonished her phone aloud. "At least, you're not fooling me."

She's texting me as Kara, asking about me.  
Oh geez. She still trying that nonsense?  
Always and forever. But who's the worst? The one trying to lie or the one refusing to confront her about it?  
it's a wash. Honestly I want to tell her and ruin it for the both of you.  
You're awful.  
And then get you two into a room and push your stupid gay heads together so you kiss.  
Kara isn't gay and also WHAT IS CONSENT  
Have you heard her say she's straight?

Do you want to go to a movie tomorrow??  
Depends on the movie. If you drag me to another waste of atoms like the Emoji Movie again...  
Aw Lee, that was once! I didn't know it was going to be that awful!  
You made me sit through the whole stupid fucking thing!

I know she told Winn she wasn't a lesbian.  
That doesn't mean she can't be gay for you.  
What the fuck come on  
Maybe Kara isn't queer but I bet Supergirl is.  
Eh  
Just imagine. A Luthor and a Super, banging on the famous LCorp desk!  
WHAT THE FUCK

I promise to let you share my Sour Patch Kids this time.  
I'll bring my own. And dump them on your head if I see a single animated smiley face.

Don't tell me you haven't thought about it.  
Shut up Sam I'm serious  
I've thought about it.

Lena sprayed scotch on her phone screen in disbelief. She wiped it off quickly and managed to swallow the rest of the alcohol in her mouth.

What if I said it was an award-winning sci-fi movie? 😢  
That's more like it. And you'll share your Sour Patch Kids?  
Anything for you! 😍

About you two together, I mean.  
What the entire fuck Arias  
You'd look so pretty together. You know you would.

Lena groaned and poured herself another large amount of scotch, flopping back on her couch. Yes, they would. But she couldn't take that leap. Not now, not ever. Maybe if her last name wasn't Luthor. But it always would be.

Please?  
All right. You drive a hard bargain, Miss Danvers.  
Yay! 8:05?

Hell, I'd even watch.  
Of course you would. Pervert  
Watching you slake your lesbian thirst is perverted? And here I thought you loved me.  
You love Supergirl's biceps.  
It's not a zero-sum game.

Yes, 8:05 is fine.  
I can't wait!!! 📽️🎬😃😄😍🤗🥰🌝😇🤓😎😸💖👍🙌🤸🧜🐭🎉  
Kara, how do you even know half of those emojis exist?

She is super hot, I'll admit.  
Your secret is safe with me. You always did have top-shelf taste.  
Ugh stop  
  
Kara to you  
Damnit woman

I got really bored in class at college once. Crazy, right?  
So you learned all the emojis rather than listening to your professor. Somehow this doesn't shock me.  
Aw not fair!!

  
You to Kara  
I can't believe you

Have I ever been fair, darling?  
Nope.  
I'm gonna get treated to another Luthors Are Evil monologue aren't I

Admit it. You like her. A lot.  
And? It's bad enough the world can see me as Kara's best friend. What if I were linked with Supergirl?  
Your mother would be furious. And I'd be so proud.  
Yeah well.  
  
Ask Supergirl

Lena gulped down her scotch and closed her eyes for a second. She wasn't that drunk, but she wanted to act like it.

I wish  
Do or do not. Wish is a website for cheap shit delivered next year.

In person. Typing it out is tiring.  
It's tiring watching you try to make me believe you're bad.  
You have no idea.

Any more memes you'd like to try to roll my eyes out of my head with  
Sure  
  
You til the end of time  
Aah  
  
Me to you  
Goddamnit

You're a beautiful ray of moonlight, Lena. Deal with it!  
If I didn't know better, I'd swear you were flirting, Miss Danvers.

But you are. The most useless of all!  
Just because I haven't tried jumping my biffle's bones yet?  
And I don't know why you haven't.  
Because we can't be like that. The world hates us.  
But you could do something maybe a little evil and have her pin you to the wall to make you stop. And then kiss.

Telling my best friend she's pretty is flirting? Ok Boomer  
That'd be nice I guess  
  
Oh fuck. Wrong person.

Lena wanted to curl up into a ball and die. She'd just sent the thirstiest of all Tumblr text posts to the person she was thirstiest for. -Fuuuuuuuuuuuck!-

SAM I SENT HER SOMETHING THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FOR YOU  
What did you do  
  
Oh no

Kara Danvers, listen closely. That text was meant for me.  
I'm sorry, I'll forget I ever read it. Of course she likes you, you're amazing and perfect.  
What? Oh shut the fuck up, we haven't got time for this. She sent it to me but IT WAS ABOUT YOU.  
What?  
I swear to God, Supergirl, if you don't get your game face on, go over there in the next five minutes and DO WHAT SHE WANTS YOU TO DO ALREADY  
Are you sure?  
STOP BEING USELESS I'M WEARING OUT MY CAPS LOCK  
You said Supergirl  
We both know and have known for years, you're neither cute nor clever. What she wants is for you to make a damn move and be assertive about it. GET OVER THERE NOW!

Kara tore her glasses off, then stuck her phone in a special pocket and flew.

She hasn't answered me back yet. Oh God I've ruined everything.  
No, you haven't.  
I have!

Lena's eyes were filled with tears and she was trying to wipe them off of her face when she heard Kara's boots hit her balcony.

Kara strode in, but stopped dead at the sight before her. Lena, the woman she loved with all her heart and soul, was essentially curled up in a ball of anguish and alcohol over one misplaced text.

"Hi," Lena managed to exhale, staring at Supergirl's red boots. -Of course she's wearing the suit. That damn suit. Curves. God.-

"Lena..." Kara grabbed her hand gently and laced their fingers together.

Lena dared to glance up, sweet green eyes filled with anxious tears, and Kara melted like snow in the face of sun.

She tugged on their hands so Lena would stand up. Carefully, she led the devastated woman to the closest hallway in the suite, and then gently but firmly pinned her against the nearest wall with her own body. Assertive, Sam had said.

Lena gasped, almost hiccuping. "What?"

"A little birdie said that text might not have been meant for me, but it was about me," Kara replied, voice low and intense. She pulled their intertwined hands just above Lena's head, and then carefully grabbed her other wrist and pinned it the same way. "-Was- it about me, Lena -darling-?" She carefully pushed her hips against Lena's to trap her further.

Lena shivered uncontrollably. "Yes," she managed to sigh.

"Wonderful," Kara purred, leaping for joy internally as she saw what her newfound dominance was doing for Lena's desire. "Now, if you say I can, I'd very, -very- much like to kiss you."

Lena bit her lip and nodded frantically.

"Use your words, babe."

Lena's chest heaved as she felt Kara's knee wedge firmly between hers, thigh pressing up where she needed it most and -oh- god--"Please kiss me, Kara!"

Kara obliged her happily, their mouths parting almost instantly to deepen the kiss, and Lena was -gone-, dissolved in a haze of electric blue lust.

"Lena," Kara purred when they had to break for air, Lena gasping with her forehead resting on Kara's shoulder since everywhere else was pinned. "I've wanted to do this for -years-."

"Why haven't you?" Lena tried rolling her hips down against Kara's thigh, whimpering as the friction against steel felt too amazing for words.

"Because everyone else wants you and I'm terrible at self-advocating," Kara sighed. "I honestly figured you and James didn't work out because you and Sam..."

"Sam and I have never been that way," Lena murmured. "Never. These days she just teases me about you."

"Ah," Kara replied on an exhale. "So. This -is- a thing." She shifted her weight so the thigh between Lena's legs had more room to maneuver.

Lena choked back a cry as the welcome pressure on her core increased and her toes no longer touched the floor. "Oh my -god-, Kara."

"Tell me, Lena."

"Tell you what?" Lena tried her wrists. She could rotate them, but Kara had her so easily like this, the steel had her locked down and she -loved- it.

"Tell me how to take you now." Kara leaned in and trailed a few kisses down Lena's jaw. "And then tell me how to love you the right way."

Lena keened, she couldn't help it, and her hips rolled her core against Kara's thigh again, stealing her breath. "Love?" she managed to whisper.

"Surely you don't think I do this to my -friends-," Kara smirked. "You can't think I'd pin a mere -buddy- in the air against their own wall and kiss them breathless?"

Lena looked into Kara's eyes, the love and lust and will to possess swirling there in deep blue pools. "I...I suppose not?"

Kara shook her head slowly, not breaking eye contact. "No, I don't. But we're not buddies, Lena. We're not -friends-. We've been hiding a lot of truth under that best friends forever label."

Lena bit her lip, squirming involuntarily and oh -fuck- Kara's leg was still -there- and she -wanted---

"If I hold you here and kiss you, could you get yourself off on my thigh, do you think?" Kara's intense gaze pierced Lena's soul. "Would you like that?"

Lena harshly bit back a moan at that. "Yes..." she managed to reply in a soft tone.

"Get to it then, darling." Kara dove in for an almost bruising kiss, snatching her strength back before she truly lost control.

Lena found herself whining into Kara's mouth desperately and rutting against her leg before she quite knew which way was up. All she -did- know was that the only parts of her allowed to move were her mouth and her hips, the rest being pinned in place. Not being able to use her hands was both hot -and- annoying, since she couldn't help herself along. But the raw display of dominance over her, the warm steel locked around her wrists and supporting her weight fully, had always been a fantasy, even if the captor in her dreams hadn't had a face or gender until just a couple of years ago.

"Come for me any time you want, Lena. Just make sure you -do-." Lena moaned and bucked her hips as Kara leaned in to nip and ever so lightly suck at her neck. "I know, babe. I know you want to. Rao, I want you to."

Lena crossed her ankles and redoubled her efforts. "Kara, Kara...god..."

"What do you need to hear, babe?" Kara nipped at her earlobe. "What do you need to feel?"

"Tell me..." Lena was losing the plot in her head but she was still so far from release. "Tell me how..."

"How what? How to come for me? Or how I wanna have you when I let you down from here? Do...do you want me to talk -dirty-, Lena?" Kara was completely out of character for herself, but then she supposed that, if pressed, this would be how Supergirl did things.

"In that voice, yes," Lena hissed.

"Then you'd better keep grinding down like the good girl I know you are," Kara growled. "Harder. -Harder-."

Lena keened again as she obeyed, helpless to do anything but.

"When you finish, you can ride my fingers," Kara purred. "I -know- you want that."

Lena let her head fall forward, onto Kara's shoulder, and she dug her teeth in as she kept rutting. Skin she couldn't mark, couldn't bruise, couldn't hurt, so her small act of violence was safe. The suit didn't even taste half-bad, either.

"Oh, I wish you could see yourself now, Lena," Kara cooed. "All sweaty and bothered as fuck, but so beautiful under me."

Lena's hips stuttered at the curse word. Kara, Kara -Danvers- throwing an f-bomb?

Kara scoffed. "You like it when I say fuck, Lena? That's what gets you?"

Lena could only manage a short, desperate moan around the mouthful of super suit she still had.

"Then for the love of Rao, babe, finish -fucking- yourself on my leg so I can -fuck- you myself," Kara hissed.

Lena latched onto Kara's neck with lips and teeth as she rocked frantically back and forth, reaching her peak just as Kara managed to nudge her head back for a final, deep kiss.

"Oh my -god-," Lena managed to sigh when her body had finally stilled. "I've never done that before."

"If it helps, neither have I," Kara admitted sheepishly, letting Lena down slowly.

"So...not friends," Lena said slowly, her hands creeping up Kara's arms to cross her wrists behind her neck.

"Definitely not." Kara's arms slid around Lena's waist firmly. "I'm so glad we finally see eye to eye on that."

"Not how I imagined our first date," Lena bantered, relaxing into Kara's hold.

"Me either, but I'm not upset," Kara smirked. "Dinner before the movie tomorrow night, though?"

"-Yes-. But what about tonight?"

"I think I promised you things." Kara's smirk turned mischievous.

Lena grinned. "You did indeed."

"You have to remind me, though. Oh, and we should text Sam. She might be worried."

"If I text her and tell her it's okay now, do I get to ride your fingers like you promised?" Lena batted her eyes.

Kara broke into a huge grin. "I think I like the way you make deals."

Thanks, Sam.  
Please tell me this is Kara texting from Lena's phone.  
No, it's me. But I promised I'd send you a message in exchange for NSFW things happening shortly.  
Good. Get to it, you useless sapphics. You have a lot of time to make up for.


End file.
